There are times in marriage when we are just broken. Broken together as two people become one.
Broken together through years of facing incredible challenges, a death in the family, hurt feelings, unresolved anger, resting on opposite sides of an important decision and feelings of disappointment.
You’ve been there. We’ve been there.
Casting Crowns has a song called “Broken Together”
A song about marriage.
I had to listen through the song a few times to grasp even a bit of the meaning behind the almost sad words.
In fact, I looked up the lyrics so that I could read the song as a poem, a story.
The song begins by expressing how when you get married you jump into a mystery and then as life gets complicated, you wish for simpler times.
Times before you knew each others faults and weaknesses.
Times before you sinned against each other in your words or actions.
Times before painful memories and hurtful situations cloud your view of your spouse.
Then, the chorus says this:
Maybe you and I were never meant to be complete
Could we just be broken together
If you can bring your shattered dreams and I’ll bring mine
Could healing still be spoken and save us
The only way well last forever is broken together
As I thought about our marriage, about Jeremy and I, I thought about how this idea of being broken together is actually very healthy for us to remember.
Nothing goes well when one of us thinks we have it all together or feels that we’re right all the time or speaks words of superiority over the other.
We aren’t kind when we feel that way.
We aren’t compassionate when we think those things.
Love doesn’t thrive when one spouse acts better than the other.
As much as we want wholeness and healing, we really are broken, sinful people living this thing called marriage.
We hurt, we fail, we pick ourselves back up and try again.
What a blessing to have a life partner, a best friend, a faithful confidante to walk the road with you.
In realizing we are as broken as our spouse, we can together find healing in the only One who can truly heal and make us whole.
When we both understand brokenness, we abound in grace, mercy, love and compassion.
We have a new understanding of each others struggles, complications, and heart feelings.
Being broken together means truly living life hand in hand.
Not on different playing fields but on level ground.
Solid paths of God-directed, God-led, God-inspired oneness.
And what a formidable force we can be on that path together. Fighting for marriage, fighting for friendship, for family, for love.
Because whatever we have walked through, whatever confessions have been made, whatever uphill battles we see ahead of us, we can pray this prayer over our spouse, our marriage.
I’m praying God will help our broken hearts align
And we won’t give up the fight
We are on the same team. One no more broken than the other.
Living life together
Seeking healing and growth and victory… together.
Have you ever thought about being broken together?