Dear Mom in Transition

In all the “dear mom” letters floating around the web, I had this thought that I should share…

Share my experience, my thoughts, my advice for moms.

My own “dear mom” letter.

To moms like me. Living in a state of transition.

For me, transition is a permanent state of being. Our family is on the move. regularly.

Continental moves. 3 continents in 1 year.

For others, they might be facing great change for the first time. The third time.

I don’t know that transition ever gets truly easier.

Oh, you get smarter and more confident in change.

But the work of transition is the same. The emotion remains.

The heart-stopping grief mixed fully with the joy of new adventures.

Military moms, pastor’s wives, job transfers, a move across town, empty nest, new babies… so many moms facing transition.

I thought I’d write a letter to you.

The packing mom. The moving mom. The “picking up her life, her home, her family” mom. The mom who is striving to mother in the midst of great change, huge struggle and often deep grief.

Transition requires so much from us as moms.

Physically, mentally, emotionally, relationally… the transition mom will find herself spent on all levels.

Mothering through transition is a thousand little details wrapped into a fast-paced, whirl-wind of life. lots of little lives that depend on you to transition well.

The kids still have to eat. They still need baths. The iPad still needs charged. The laundry still needs washed. somehow.

Sorting through THAT box where you THINK you placed SOMETHING you didn’t think you’d need that you now NEED.

And that happens 10 times. in one day.

The boxes and the bins and the push and pull of everything.

Suitcases. Cleaning. Sorting. Selling. Organizing.

Prepping the car for yet another big, long drive. Calculating snacks and bedtimes and potty stops and petty cash and car chargers and all the other million things you need to travel with a big family. Thinking through a long flight or mentally preparing yourself for that first day of school in a new place.

Transition is HUGE and exhausting.

Dads help. They do. They really, really do. I seriously don’t know what I’d do without Jeremy’s help.

But often, moms take on, many times of our own choosing, the brunt of the little details. The goodbye planning. The letter writing. The address changes. The thank you’s. How to pack what or what to pack where or what to unpack first or how to set up the new home.

Moms in transition, again in our own need to take care of our family, bear the weight of our own emotions and sense the burden to parent the emotions of our kids.

Because I don’t know about your kids, but my girls need Mommy in moments of fear or in times full of unknowns or during the seasons of great change.

{They could have daddy, but there is just something about mom…}

Mommy hugs. Mommy snuggles. Mommy making pancakes and doing the bedtime routine. Mommy making sure they have what they need for whatever new task is ahead.

And, as a woman, we feel it all. We feel deeply and transition magnifies the intense feelings and emotions of change.

We feel for ourselves, we feel for our husbands, we feel for our children and carry the weight of those feelings all while trying to accomplish many times our normal workload.

Sadly, in the midst of transition when we need His presence most… our time with Him gets set to the side in the light of the many, many things yet to do before, during and after transition.

So, what can we do in the midst?

Dear moms, walking in the trenches of transition as I am…

this note is for you.

Move forward.

One step at a time. Don’t look at the whole, big list of things to do. Look at Jesus and move forward as He guides your steps. It doesn’t have to be done today. Move forward. Refuse to allow the stress of change to steal the joy of life. Walk in His strength, not your own. Keep your eyes on Him. Don’t take on pressure that wasn’t meant for you. Just move forward in what you can do next.

Move forward. You can achieve much with God’s help. Invite Him in and move forward.

Breathe.

Take a deep breath. Pause. Give yourself a moment with a cup of tea and a special verse {I’m a little partial to Isaiah 43:1-3}. Breath Him in, rest in His peace. Remember that sometimes moving forward means stopping, evaluating, meditating and seeking God’s guidance for the great tasks ahead.

Just Breathe.

Trust.

You really can’t do it all. You can’t carry the burdens of transition on your own. You can’t bear the weight of transition by yourself. Trust God to move on your behalf. Trust Him to provide help. And strength. And safety. And hope. Trust Him with the many burdens you carry… leave it at His feet. Move forward and breathe in the freedom that is yours as a daughter of the Most High King.

Trust Him with it all.

Dear Mom… keep Him close. Know that He is close to you.

Psalm 139:9-10 promises that even if we settle on the far side of the sea, He is with us.

We can trust that is true. In your new home, your new job, your new family situation, your new country, your new place of mothering… He is there.

As you anticipate the coming transitions of life, you can know that not only is He with you… but He is already there in your new season, working and moving ahead of you.

He knows. He sees. He longs to carry your burdens and make your load light. He feels and hurts and cries with you as you feel and hurt and cry tears of sadness, happiness, anger and joy.

Accept grace. Give grace. See opportunities to grow and expand and strengthen your faith. Rejoice in little victories. Turn to God. Give Him praise as you experience Him in fresh ways.

You can do this. You can transition well. You will look back on all you’ve done and all you’ve learned and know that God was doing something big all along.

Small steps of faith. Big mountains to climb.

*an image I saw on twitter that I thought I’d share with you

Dear mom, I’m praying for you. Praying that God will continue to equip you in your transition. Praying that He will continue to help me in my transition.

I would love for you to leave me YOUR favorite verse in times of change or stress or transition. A verse of promise or help or encouragement. Wouldn’t a big, long list of precious scriptures on this post be beautiful?

What verse is your “just breathe” verse?

Please share with all of us. We are many, us moms who face change. We are strong together, encouraging each other in this moving path of life.

So, moms in transition…

move forward. breathe. trust. every single day.

He is with you and He is already there… wherever there may be.

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