I’ve been running the phrase “encouragement in marriage” around in my head, trying to think about encouragement in our marriage.
How do we encourage each other?
Honestly, Jeremy isn’t a man of many words. He is very purposeful when he chooses to speak and encouragement isn’t something that comes easily for him. I sense his encouragement through actions rather than words.
For a wordy girl like me, that has been kind of hard to get used to in our marriage.
But, over the past few years, knowing words are important to me, he has started ending our day with saying something encouraging to me.
Something simple, something like, “Jen, you’re fantastic.” or “Jen, you look beautiful today.”
Yes, it makes my night.
*girly sigh
But, as much as I do love words, I have realized the value of his steadfast, encouraging ways. The sense I get from his actions, feeling his encouragement rather than hearing him say encouraging things.
If you’ve been reading the blog over the past 2 years, you know that I’ve been in the middle of a physical battle.
A battle with the unknown.
A battle with a possible scary diagnosis of MS.
Recently, I was in Cleveland. again. This time for a spinal tap. Another step in the process…
Through this entire thing, as life changing as it may be for us, Jeremy has been a rock.
His encouragement comes through strength, understanding, care and calm.
His attention never wavers and his emotions are steady. His ability to provide a quiet place in the storm is the most valuable encouragement I’ve ever received.
The other night, as I pulled up some information about some of the test results we’ve seen so far, I walked over to his chair and knelt down by his arm. He took my face in his hands and said, “Jen, whatever comes, we will get through it.”
In that moment, I didn’t need to know how fantastic I was or how beautiful I was… I needed him.
I needed the encouragement that comes from sharing a burden with my soul mate.
I needed the encouragement that is Jeremy.
How does encouragement happen in your marriage?
It might not look like you think it should. You might need to dig deep and find his way of encouraging you. Don’t be afraid to talk with your spouse about the phrase “encouragement in marriage” and let him know how he can encourage you best!
And make sure you ask the question right back.
“How can I encourage you? more? better?”
It will change how you see your spouse and change how you feel about your marriage!
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River
December 6, 2012 at 3:31 amI appreciate that you share honestly about how it can be hard to get used to differences in marriage(and how we women just seem to like to talk more!). I know I had a hard time getting used to marriage because of that. My husband tends to encourage most vocally when we are having a conversation about something emotional. Otherwise, he tends to show his love through actions, and I think that is something that takes time to learn to appreciate.
H-Mama
June 23, 2012 at 10:03 pmsuch a sweet, sweet post, jenilee. (i, too, want to keep calling you jen. 😉 words can be so comforting to the soul when given in love at such tender moments. life and death are truly in our words. priceless.
great catching up with you… chocolate mouths, eyebrows, and all! 😉
Amber
June 23, 2012 at 12:04 amOh this is beautiful. (Made me all teary eyed.)
Thank you so much for sharing.
I didn’t know about your physical trials and your tests. Praise God for giving you such a wonderful husband to go through this with you. =)
Kelly @ Sufficient Grace Ministries
June 21, 2012 at 12:05 amLove, love, love this! Love that he encouraged you that way…what a picture of married love and oneness the way God intended, and love that you get that encouragement comes in different forms and languages. Often wives make the mistake of expecting their husbands to communicate the way they would instead of being a student of their husbands and looking for signs of affection and encouragement the way they would show it. You are a beautiful example of a wife who gets her husband. Love that.
Lynnette Kraft
June 20, 2012 at 6:21 pmI’m with you – having our husband’s strength to lean on is worth so much! I can tell you have a good marriage… and a happy family. You all always have smiles on your faces.
This post was very touching “Jen”. (ha! Couldn’t resist.)
Jenilee
June 20, 2012 at 7:02 pmoh Lynnette, you can call me Jen! 🙂
Theresa
June 19, 2012 at 11:19 amOk, I got tears in my eyes when he held your face in his hands. My husband is the same way, a man of few words; and like you, I am wordy. My husband surprises me sometimes with his depth of thought on things…when he does have an opinion, it’s usually very well thought out and full of insight and exactly right.
I will keep you in my prayers, Jen!
Jenilee
June 19, 2012 at 12:43 pmThank you for the prayers! Yes, when he speaks, it is well thought out and full of truth. God has blessed me so much!
The Mueller's
June 18, 2012 at 8:57 pmLOVE this post! 🙂 {{hug}}
Sherri Davidson
June 18, 2012 at 5:38 pmWith God, and an amazing hubby like that you guys will get through anything. Beautiful post!!!