Living on the edge of eternity, knowing that I’m not home yet has become incredibly clear in the past few years.
“Can I heat up some coffee?” asked a friend recently visiting our apartment.
“Sure!”
“Wait… I don’t have a microwave… uhm, here’s a pan.” I poured her coffee into a pan and we heated it up. Then, we poured it back in her mug.
I don’t have a microwave. No heating something up quick, no popcorn {I could make it on the stove but, well… I’ve had popcorn fiascoes in the microwave… I can only imagine the stove!}, no butter melt button. The list goes on.
Honestly, not having a microwave is NO BIG DEAL! We are super busy anyway, food packaging is small in France so we rarely have leftovers and we can live without popcorn.
But I thought the other night about how I wished I brought our popcorn maker that a sweet friend sent us. Sadly, it had to stay at home.
And I need it now.
But, as I’m thinking these really quite silly thoughts… I do not need my popcorn maker…
I don’t need a microwave.
I don’t “need” any of the other things I think we “need”.
Partly because living on the edge of eternity simply has its own joys. Partly because I don’t have to clean or store or keep up any extra appliances. Partly because anything we buy here in France either has to be sold or given away or shipped to Africa next summer.
And I don’t want to have to deal with a bunch of stuff again next summer. I want to pack up our apartment in our bins, buy a few things we will really, truly NEED in Senegal and be on our way!
No fuss or issues with unnecessary stuff.
But to keep that attitude is a daily discipline… especially when a moment arises that I DO need something I don’t have. When I want to use something I am used to having in the states and I don’t have it here.
Be it a microwave or a big Christmas tree or my ornaments or fall decorations or pictures for the walls or a popcorn maker for movie night… I don’t need any of it for our family to be settled, be happy, or make memories.
I laid in bed last night thinking about how this isn’t home. Well, it is for a year. Kinda of like our last few homes… they are temporary places to sleep and eat.
Life is happening outside the place of “home”. Our lives are meant for leaving home and being about His business.
And the only thing that ran through my mind was this song.
The words, “All I know is I’m not home yet, This is not where I belong, Take this world and give me Jesus, This is not where I belong”
It is a theme that God is speaking to me, reminding me that this, this life, this earth, this moment is NOT home.
This quote was in my devotions the other day. And it is a constant breath across my mind.
“Many treasures, loved and cherished – only let Him stay. Other joys no more may bless me; other friends may leave my side; Only let me hold His friendship; only let Him still abide. Let the chill mists fall about me; let the lights of earth grow dim; Leave me Jesus, only Jesus; I am satisfied with Him.” – Unknown
It molds perfectly to another part of the song above… “When the earth shakes I wanna be found in You, When the lights fade I wanna be found in You.”
In the little lessons of not having a stocked kitchen full of great, awesome appliances…
In the big, heart breaking moments of missing family…
I want to be found in Him. I want to say when the mist falls and the lights fade… “Leave me Jesus. I am satisfied with Him.”
When my earth shakes, I want Him standing with me. Not a microwave or popcorn maker. I want Him.
Because this life isn’t home. We aren’t meant to be fully comfortable here. We are made for another time, another place.
We are living on the edge of eternity. Every single day.
And as the news worsens around us and this world continues to crumble, we don’t have the time to wish for things.
We only have the energy left to share the love of God, to be a light and to be about His business.
Knowing that He is all we need. He is all the world needs. He is the answer. The reason. The only hope and joy to be found comes through Him.
We aren’t home yet.
This isn’t home. Not this apartment in France. Not our house waiting in Senegal. Not a mission house or my parent’s house back home.
None of it is home.
Just Jesus.
Let me be satisfied fully with Him. He is our invisible foundation and the rock we stand on until we stand with Him.
This isn’t a “pat us on the back because we are living this and have left as missionaries” post.
This is a challenge for us all to live on the edge of eternity. I’m not home. You aren’t home. Our home is in heaven and with each passing day, heaven comes closer for me and for you.
Are you satisfied with Him? If you lost your microwave and your home and your job and your everything, can you say you are satisfied with Jesus?
Are you teaching your kids that life in Him is more important this year’s Halloween costume or tons of candy or the next best book that is coming out in the world of YA or what is on their Christmas list or what they are planning for their next big birthday party? Do they know that Jesus is all they need? Are they able to sing the song, “All I know is I’m not home yet?”
This is a challenge for me and a challenge for you.
For my life, for the life of the kids coming up in the next generation of believers…
Is Jesus all we need? Is our home, our hope, and our very life found in Him?
Are we living on the edge of eternity?
Living Life in a Fishbowl
I just wrote a very similar post about our return to the States to finish our fundraising. Everywhere we go we have to leave someone behind and we miss them so much, and really the only joy we have is to look forward to when we all get to finally be together in Heaven. I am praying for you all because we are six months into this adventure, and it is still a daily challenge to know we don’t NEED that microwave (and maybe soon I will just buckle down and learn how to make popcorn on the stove), or a TV, or counters, or all the other things that we have lived without for six months but would be really nice. And in language learning and living it can be so hard to remember the reason, to have more people with us in Heaven when we get there. So God bless you in your days, and nights, and all those moments when it is so hard. We are here with you, even though we are in a different country. We love you even though we have never met you. We pray for you always. God be with you!
I just read your blog post… thanks for your sweet comment on our blog. yes, we’ve had similar moments with our girls about “home”. Sometimes our apartment here is home… many times, they long for our “other home”. tears in my eyes reading this. I’m praying for you as you are back in the states, that it will be a restful, wonderful time and that God will meet every need. God Bless!!
Yes…”Home is wear your heart is!” And it is so true we NEED Jesus more than anything or anyone! Love to you and your precious family. I am loving all of your pictures…and hearing about all of the things you are learning along your journey!
we are learning so much!!! God is faithful to help us learn what He wants us to know in His precious timing. We need Him every single day!
This is a beautiful reminder for us ALL! Thank u for sharing your heart! I was told the other day on FB I was a blessing to a young girl in Evan’s grade, we give her rides home from school and we laugh…. she said I’m like a second mom….a best friend, she sees my posts about Jesus, etc. It blessed me immensely because I feel I’m just being me, who God called me to be. If he wants me to love on these kids who have “rough” homes, I will!! It is a BLESSING doing His will even when we barely know it!! NOW is the time to ne about our King’s business…. now more than ever! We LOVE your posts, pictures, encouraging when we feel things “get hard.” May our God bless you all richly!! We will see u in His Kingdom one day!!
It is a reminder for us all of us to live as Christ calls us wherever we are! We aren’t home yet… and one day we’ll all be home together!