Having a successful marriage takes a little extra thought and work.
And sometimes it means NOT doing things in marriage that you otherwise might be doing.
Unknowingly, of course, right? #wink
I wrote recently about 1 Thing you should not do in Marriage.
It flew around facebook and twitter and pinterest… striking a cord with many women.
So, I asked my husband, “What is your 1 thing you shouldn’t do in marriage? Something you would tell husbands about a successful marriage?”
He thought about it for a second.
Jokingly, he looked at me with that huge grin, “Well I know the 1 thing you SHOULD do in marriage…”
I hit his shoulder and said, “Be serious.”
That’s why I don’t have HIM post here on the blog… #wink
“Come on… what is 1 Thing you shouldn’t do?”
He was quiet for a few minutes.
“Well, I don’t think couples should brood about things. If something is bothering you or something needs to be talked about, do it. Be open. Be honest.”
I nodded and agreed.
He went on, “When you are silent and brooding, it doesn’t just hurt the other person. It hurts you both.”
Sometimes in marriage, things can get rough. And it can be easy to withdraw, close in and stop talking.
Hurt, heartbreak, breaking trust, feelings of inadequacy, frustration, anger… all things that naturally cause us to shut down.
When we are silent or unsmiling or quiet or brooding.
We don’t look like ourselves.
We don’t show joy.
We don’t show love.
Some very good reasons not to brood over things. Very good reasons to connect, talk, share in openness and honesty together.
Even the hard conversations. Even when this common marriage problem pops up.
Even the things that seem uncomfortable.
Don’t let silence hurt your marriage.
Because this is a much better picture of the joy couples have when they decide that brooding is one thing they shouldn’t do.
What is something you would say you shouldn’t do in a successful marriage?