Love My Husband - Why I Love Him {It might surprise you!}

Reasons I Love My Husband {They Might Surprise You!}

I do love my husband.

SO much.

Yet, sometimes in reflecting, the reasons that I love him are greatly different than what I would have said when we first got married.

We’ve made it through the first year of honeymooning, the third year of new parenthood, the seventh year of tough finances, the ninth year of health struggles, the thirteenth year of moving overseas, the seventeenth year of being diagnosed with MS.

Jeremy and I have walked through many challenging seasons during our married life.

And, we are two people who see each circumstance through different lenses.

All those things we once thought we had in common, well… we still do. But, as the marriage relationship deepens, those things get dissected to reveal many unknown differences.

Thought processes, family styles, goals, and dreams become distinct and different.

No one really explains to you before you get married how difficult it is to blend two lives in godly, healthy marriage.

Maybe they do but you just can’t understand it yet.

During dating and engagement, you can’t begin to wrap your mind around all the many changes you and your spouse will experience and grow through.

Now, at 17 years into our marriage, I can honestly say that those things that used to drive me nuts about my husband are beginning to be the very things that I love about him.

Why I love my husband

I can only imagine how much this will continue to happen as we hit 20, 25, and 50 years of married life.

You see, I could sit here today and write to you about how kind, how wonderful, how joyful, how strong, how patient, how amazing my husband is. I do love all of those things about him.

I love the dad that he is to our girls. I love his big grin. I love his passion for life. I love the steady beat of his character. I love him.

But, I wanted to write a different list. A not-so-cheery list.

A real list about my real husband.

Because marriage isn’t all cheery and wonderful. Our marriage isn’t picture perfect nor do we always act in ways we should towards each other. Marriage is hard. Our marriage is hard.

This list of reasons why I love Jeremy is difficult to write. It isn’t something I could have written even just a few years ago.

A few years ago, these things brought frustration and discouragement.

But now… prayerfully, my eyes are opening to how much I love my husband.

Opening to this list that has been growing, changing and developing.

Love My Husband - Why I Love Him {It might surprise you!}

It is a list that shapes my character, builds my faith and grows me closer to God.

A list that causes me to stop and stand in awe and respect of my husband. A list that shows me more of God’s purposes for marriage.

It is a list that surprises me yet it is a list I can look at as truth.

A list about allowing God to use our marriage in ways we never imagined.

A list about how I love my husband and why.

Marriage puts us right where God wants us and forces us to be vulnerable to His voice.

A List of Reasons why I love him now even more than before…

– he is a challenge. really. he challenges everything and makes me think. never take things as they are. always willing to dig deeper, get more facts, try for something better, reach farther, do more. Jeremy challenges me in many ways every day. To get outside myself, to see more of who God is and to live life more openly.

– he forces me to grow. he doesn’t take no for an answer. growth takes place for both of us. always moving forward and striving to understand each other better. Personally and spiritually, Jeremy is an agent for growth.

– he causes me to struggle with grace. because we still struggle. but marriage has caused me to act in grace. to respond in new ways. to pause before lashing out or wait before jumping to assumptions about his motives. I now approach struggle differently.

– he makes me face conflict. he asks questions. he asks me my opinion. he wants to know why I feel like I feel. he gives me the freedom to work out our conflicts. he has confidence in my ability to handle conflict. whether he knows it or not, this has effected many areas of my life.

– he is a mirror to my faults. many times what is annoying me about him is something that I do myself. many times when I want to point out something in his life, I can find that same thing in mine. he calls me out and gives me new eyes to see my heart.

– he teaches me selflessness. this marriage isn’t just about me. life isn’t just about me. we are a team. we work together. we go together. we live together. we follow Jesus together. we serve together.

Now, these aren’t things we’ve discussed. In fact, he may not even know he does these things. He may be just as surprised as I was when I realized that I love these things about him.

{hmmm… I might not even want him to see this post!}

Love My Husband - Why I Love Him {It might surprise you!}

Not only do I love these things about him, I am eternally thankful that God is using our marriage to make me into the woman of God He created me to be.

I love my husband in deeper, stronger ways!

It isn’t fun. It is always uncomfortable and there are times that I still just want to be mad and step out of the growth process. I don’t always want to act in grace or face conflict or see my faults so clearly.

But, it is good for me. It is good for us.

Marriage truths that you don’t think about and that just might surprise you.

6 Ways to Love Your Husband

How I love my husband and how these reasons grow throughout the years.

Are you thankful for any of these things in your marriage?

Have you taken the time to really love what God can do in you through your spouse?


  1. Agreed agreed agreed.My husband and I have been married 2 years and these are things we are discovering as well. Marriage is not the rainbows and butterflies I thought it was going to be when we got engaged. But I’m so glad it’s not. My marriage has transformed my walk with Christ like it would have never transformed if I were single. Praise God I have my husband!!!! These are all things I love about him too! 🙂

  2. What a thoughtful post! Yes, God uses our husbands to grow us in Him. One of the most wonderful ways God loves me is through my husband. A godly marriage is truly a blessing beyond measure.

  3. Such a beautiful post! And I love that your hubby was your first commenter. You’re so right about marriage not always being cheery and wonderful. However, if couples are willing to commit to those challenges, then they can commit to anything together. I found your blog through the Happy Wives Club, but I’m bookmarking it to visit often! Thanks for sharing your heart.

  4. Your list brought tears to my eyes. Yes … challenges, growth, struggle, conflict and the mirror for ourselves … your eloquent words hold such simple, heart-wrenching truth. It’s why we love them and they love us, and why God must be first in the relationship. Lovely words. Thank you!

  5. What a beautiful post. God definately has been doing a work in my marriage (24 years strong). I never considered making a list of the more challenging things I love about my husband. Great idea!

  6. Hi, you don’t know us, but we stumbled across your blog a few weeks back after google searching our last name! We are the Goodwins from Kansas! We wanted to write and say we have found your blog to be very uplifting and inspirational! It seems as though we are on very similar paths too, kind of ironic! Grace and peace to your family!

    Darin and Cristina Goodwin

    1. I’m so glad you commented today! Hi Goodwins from Kansas!! If you are on facebook, I’d love to connect with you there 🙂 nice to meet you both! Thanks for visiting our blog!

  7. Jen, I love you to and I am so grateful that we have been devoted to one another for the past 11 years. I anxiously await wading through to get to 50. And, for the record I have always loved your faults. Although it could be because you remind me that I love them, “You think it’s cute when I do that” or “That’s why you married me.” Either way, I Love You! Great post.

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