With books out there like:
How could I write something so lofty?
As I’ve thought about and prayed about this post, I’ve realized that I can write such a post.
Not because we have the most healthiest of marriages or we have overcome some great problem in our marriage or I have a degree in marriage counseling.
I’ve decided that I can give real life, real tips on how God is leading us to have a healthy marriage.
Your list might look different, some of these tips might not work for you and your spouse, some of them might be right on.
But… the goal of this Ultimate Guide to a Healthy Marriage is to challenge YOU to write your OWN list.
Why?
Because in the praying and thinking about such a list, God will show you ways to make YOUR marriage healthy. He will bring His Word to life for you and grow you in ways that will positively impact your relationship with God and with your spouse.
So, I have for you today a guide.
Our {In Random Order} Ultimate Guide to a Healthy Marriage:
1} Like your spouse even on the bad days
2} Respect their time, space and needs
3} Compromise. Don’t just say a fast No
4} Communicate. About everything.
5} Don’t go to bed angry.
6} Take time to cool off so that you don’t say things you don’t mean to say
7} Don’t fall into the “you always” or “you never” phrase trap
8} Sacrifice yourself for your spouse
9} Love your spouse like God loves them
10} Don’t keep a record of wrongs
11} Freely forgive. Even if they don’t ask for it.
12} Love in their love language, not your own
13} Pray for them everyday
14} Be willing to keep growing even if you don’t see change reciprocated
15} Remember, change starts with you.
16} Believe the best of their motives and intentions. Don’t assume the worst.
17} Spend time doing the things they love – 20 Date Ideas!
18} Send love notes and texts – this is perfect!
19} Surprise them once and awhile
20} Go the extra mile
21} Serve without expecting to be served
22} Learn to read their actions and expressions – Read about the 5 Love Languages
23} Be comfortable with silence
24} Don’t expect more than they can give
25} Spend time without kids
26} Trust them to make decisions as God directs
27} Remember, you are not responsible for their spiritual life
28} Listen when they speak
29} Reach out, even when your mad
30} Be thankful for the spouse that God has made them to be
31} Practice the fruits of the Spirit and the love chapter and the golden rule…
I asked Jeremy if he had anything else to add to this list.
If you are married, you probably know what he said.
To guys, that is definitely on their list. In fact, it is at the TOP of their healthy marriage list.
A special note to wives… the physical side of marriage is a very important part of having a healthy marriage. Don’t ignore it. God created it to bind you together in ways that no other relationship on earth can experience.
Need to add some spice in that area? Try going on dates {that link will take you to our top 20 ideas!} and working on keeping things hot during the busy times!
You can also click through the links in this post. Some lead to another post on that topic or books or resources to help you in that area of your marriage.
What now?
Whether you hopped over here from the link up or pinterest or twitter or wherever… you have now have the challenge to go write your own list.
Ask God how to make YOUR marriage healthy. Let Him help you create YOUR ultimate list to a healthy marriage!
How to Have your own Family Olympics
I love your blog. I agree with your post. My husband and I will be married 20 years in June. We have been through so many ups and downs. We even came to the brink of losing each other, but our love was too strong, so we grew up, worked on our relationship and ourselves. Today, we are more in love and closer than we have ever been. We learned what true, selfless, unconditional love means and I thank God we have the marriage that God intended us to have, We are so grateful!
Even after 25 years of marriage I find this list is something to refer back to when problems arise in my relationship. There is a lot of communication between us but no guide lines or benchmarks, per say to follow. This is a great first step. Thank you
I enjoyed your post! Thank you!
Great list!
Love this! Very good stuff, my friend.
This is really good. You could expand these and make an ebook. Just take out the love language one, guys dislike that book
Some great tips! Thanks for posting this. It is always a good reminder to focus on your marriage!
I really enjoyed this post! I can attest after 26 years of marriage that you said it well.